Day 15: Mentorship and Influence – Those Who Guided Me and Those I’ve Guided


I don’t have a mentor. 😅 Yes, before you come at me with guns blazing, let me explain.


My earliest encounters with the concept of mentorship left a sour taste. What I saw wasn't growth through guidance, it was mimicry (English Dy cry for my hand this month 😅). It was people losing themselves in someone else’s shadow, adopting personalities that weren’t theirs, just to wear the badge of “I’m being mentored.”


I remember a particular instance, a lady I had known to be calm, soft-spoken, and gentle suddenly raised her voice over something trivial. Everyone in the room was stunned. I later asked her why she reacted that way. Her response? “That’s how my mentor handles such situations.” I was dumbfounded… and honestly, a little disappointed.


If your mentor asks you to dip your hand in fire, would you?


Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying mentorship is bad. Not at all. I believe in guidance. I believe in learning from others. But I’ve also learned to filter. I don’t need to follow someone to the letter just because they’re ahead of me. I can admire people, learn from the positive traits they exhibit, and move on. No strings attached. No blind loyalty. No copy-paste personality shift.


I’ve developed this personal theory: the more I admire someone and try to get closer, the more likely I am to see their flaws, their humanity, and possibly lose sight of the very things that drew me to them. Maybe that’s why I don't do crushes or relationships? 🌚😅 Just maybe.


So, do I have people who have guided me? Yes, absolutely. But I don’t label them mentors. I don’t even call them anything special, does it mean they're not special to me? Nope. I respect them deeply for the role they’ve played in shaping my journey. In every area of my life; spiritual, career, financial, and even physical, there are people I look up to. Some of them know I do. Most don’t. And that’s fine. I learn what I need to, apply it with wisdom, and carry on.


As for me being an influence, that’s a heavy one. I don’t see myself as someone others would naturally look up to. But I’ve come to realize that someone, somewhere might be watching. And because of that, I strive to live with integrity. To hold fast to principles I believe in. Not to appear perfect, but to be intentional. If anyone ever chooses to take a piece of my life as a reference, may it never lead them into confusion or destruction.


In the end, maybe I’ve been mentored in fragments, through books, conversations, corrections, silent observations. And maybe, in those same fragments, I’ve mentored others too. Quietly. Indirectly. But meaningfully.


#becoming #30daysofreflection

#journeysofar