Day 8 – Love and Relationships: Romantic Highs/Lows, Love Languages, Lessons Learned


For the longest time, I wasn't much of a lover. If I ever found myself in a relationship, it was often from a strategic standpoint, calculated, guarded, and emotionally measured. Not that I didn’t care about the people I dated; I did. I showed up, I listened, I supported. But there was always a wall I couldn’t let down, a line I wouldn’t cross emotionally. Vulnerability felt like weakness, and strength, to me, meant never letting anyone get too close. I mastered the art of giving just enough but never everything.


That mindset shaped a number of my past relationships. They were never quite whole, never deeply rooted in emotional truth. Yet somewhere along the line, life began to shift. I met someone who cracked that wall, gently, patiently, and unknowingly. Being with that person taught me that real strength isn’t in holding back but in letting go. In being seen. In being soft in a world that demands hard edges.


The version of me from three years ago would probably scoff at this reflection. That version would never admit to being emotional, let alone falling genuinely in love. But that’s the irony of life, change is the only constant. You don’t always see it coming, but it reshapes you in ways you can’t deny.


Romantic love comes with its highs, no doubt. Those moments of pure connection, shared laughter, and the magic of simply being with someone who gets you—those are the highs I’ll always hold onto. The “awwn” moments where time slows, and reality blurs into something more beautiful. When love feels like a shield, making you feel invincible. That kind of love is rare, and when you have it, it’s everything.


But love isn’t just sunshine and rose petals. The lows ah, the lows cut deep. There are memories I hesitate to even revisit, stories I can’t bring myself to share. Pain has a way of carving silence into the heart. Some nights, like this one, I reflect and find myself staring at questions that never got answers and wounds that never truly closed.


For a long time, I thought my love language was physical touch. But now, I’m not sure I speak any one language. I think what I crave isn’t found in categories or checklists. I just want love, pure, intentional, and kind. Not performative, not strategic. Just real.


The hardest lessons are often learned through heartbreak. Mine were no exception. And though I’ve tasted both the sweetness and sorrow of love, I still believe in it. That hasn’t changed. What’s changed is me. Do I want to love again? Maybe. Do I believe I can love again? Probably. But will I ever let myself be that vulnerable again? Definitely no.


To everyone out there who’s found love, true, deep, unshakable love, I hope it never grows cold. Guard it, water it, fight for it. Because when it’s real, it’s worth everything.


So until then, here's to the ashes of what was beautiful, amazing and true which now lies in ruins.


#Becoming #30DaysofReflection

#journeysofar


📸 By Lemuel Stixx Samuel 

Kebbi state 2024